Dear Shaina,

You’re grossed out by my fish!! I haven’t slept for a week worrying about that bacteria laden cucumber you ate off the streets of India!  At least my fish…every last slimy sticky glob of it…was washed repeatedly in Birmingham’s finest chlorinated water before being sterilized for over an hour in a continuously boiling salted broth.  My Gefilte Fish would pass surgical hygienic standards.

My only comfort is knowing that they have now discovered that we have as many types of bacteria living in our gut as we have cells in our body…and that many of them are beneficial to our health.  In fact, the greater the diversity of bacteria, the more likely the good bacteria will beat out the bad bacteria…or something like that. We know you have lots of bacteria and they are certainly diverse…let’s just hope the good kind wins!  I also understand that saliva contains antibacterial qualities, so be sure to immerse that street food in a lot of spit before swallowing.

Shaina, it is hard to believe that you will be 25 years old next week. Where has 25 years gone? Bubbe and Zayde’s words are ringing in my ears, “Ahh, the life…it goes so fast!”

Your birthday is a day of celebration for me too.  It is the day I became a mother.  I had no clue what that meant or how it would “look” on me. I thought I knew exactly what you would be like.  I realized very quickly that I had to get to know who you were, separate and distinct from me.  In your own quiet way you showed me and I slowly learned how to be your mother and …to find myself in that role, as well.  You have been teaching me ever since.

My Cooking Shoes

Here I am, again, readjusting my step and finding my balance as I wander into my new status as the mother of a budding-independent-young-adult child. I watch you negotiating and maneuvering the foundations of your adult life…so far away…so different from my own world…so filled with richness and promise….and I am proud and a little anxious…and filled with love and awe!

I am honored and more than grateful to be your mother and I will celebrate the day of your birth with gratitude… and prayers for many more birthday celebrations.

In the meantime, I am feeling pressured by all this intense recipe sharing.  I know that kids are supposed to grow up and surpass their parents..and I am truly grateful that you are well on your way to doing that.  I am just so intimidated by your menus and the disparate flavors and food you so ingeniously put together. I remember Bubbe’s longstanding repertoire of foods.  She had her specialties…briskets and blintzes, strudels and knishes…and we loved them and asked her to make them on every occasion…again and again.

I tried on her recipes and made them mine. I filled in with my own culinary experiments and derivations and she eagerly tasted and complimented and kvelled (bragged to anyone who would listen) about my prowess. There was room enough for both of us in the kitchen.

I find myself retreating to my own specialties and comfort foods, content (while kvelling) to leave you to venture into unfamiliar species of grains and chias and edible grasses.  There will always be room enough for both of us in the kitchen.

The recipe (I am embarrassed to even call it a recipe) I am sharing today is one that you survived on as a child and your friends requested when they slept over. Dad and I often enjoy it on leisurely Sunday mornings or as a middle-of-the-week dinner.  The Cheese Omelet holds a lifetime of memories and thrives in every life stage and transition. It can probably even be replicated in India.

Shaina, your Dad and I wish you a very happy and healthy and safe birthday…and many, many more! We love you all the way to the outer edges of our hearts!

Love,

Mom

xoxoxoxoxooxoxo

Dad showing off his matching (?) socks

Still Playing Together

Standard Cheese Omelet

(for 2 or 3 people)

• 3 whole eggs
• 2 egg whites
• 2 Tablespoons half and half or milk
• ~ 2” square of Vermont aged cheddar (grated or in small chunks or slices)
• 1 tsp butter
• Sea Salt and freshly cracked pepper to taste
• A non-stick 12” frying or sauté pan with lid

Beat eggs and egg whites with milk with a fork or whisk.

Heat a large 12” non-stick frying or sauté pan over a medium flame and add butter.

Pour beaten eggs into heated frying pan with melted butter and swirl the pan so eggs cover the entire bottom of the pan. The key to a good omelet is having a thin enough egg base to cook quickly through without burning the bottom of the omelet.

When the eggs are cooked enough to hold their shape, but not all the way through, distribute the cheese evenly over the omelet. Use more or less cheese to suit your taste and preference.  Reserve some cheese for the top of the omelet.

Lower the heat and cover the omelet with the lid for about 30 seconds to melt the cheese a bit. After the cheese has melted a little, fold the omelet in half  and sprinkle remaining cheese over the top. Reduce the flame to simmer and put the lid on the pan for about a minute to allow the omelet to cook all the way through.

Cut and serve with fresh tomatoes, sweet potato hash browns or a fresh green salad…and your favorite bread.

Variations:

Different spices, cheeses or veggies can create a whole new dish. Mix herbs into beaten eggs. Sauté veggies in pan and pour eggs over them. Always add cheese last.

My favorites:
Tarragon and Jarlsburg cheese
Basil, sundried tomatoes and feta cheese
Sauteed onions and mushrooms with cheddar or gruyere

Sweet Potato Hash Browns

• 3 sweet potatoes already baked ( I always bake extras and use the leftovers for hash browns)
• 1 small onion, chopped
• 1 clove garlic minced
• 1 Tablespoon butter or olive oil
• Salt and pepper to taste

Heat frying pan over medium heat and add butter or oil.

Sauté chopped onions in butter and oil until translucent and add minced garlic.

Cut up sweet potatoes with skins on into small chunks (~1”) and add to the frying pan with the onions and garlic.

Cook over medium heat until potatoes and onions are browned to desired crispness.

Serve as a side with the omelet.

Roasted Beets
(Just because I like them and I eat them with everything)

• Fresh beets (as many as you want)
• Olive Oil
• Sea salt and freshly cracked pepper to taste

Heat oven to 375°

Trim leaves and roots from beets.  Leave skin on and wash thoroughly, removing any rough areas.

Cut beets in small wedges or chunks.

Place cut up beets in a bowl and sprinkle lightly with olive oil ( 1TBLSP is enough for 3 cut-up beets) and toss beets in oil.

Place beets on large enough baking sheet, covered in parchment paper, to hold all cut-up beets in a single layer.

Lightly salt and pepper to taste.Place in preheated oven and bake for 30 to 45 minutes or until done to desired crispness.

Serve as a side or garnish to any meal.  Adds great color and flavor to green salads.

Dear Shaina,

I just finished scrubbing down every inch of the kitchen after another disgusting foray into the world of homemade gefilte fish.  Every year I vow I will never do it again…those glaring fish eyes and impossibly elusive little bones…those little fish bits and pieces of skin that end up stuck on every surface in the kitchen…the endless dirty pots and bowls reeking from the debris of overcooked onions and fish carcasses… and the smell!.  What was I thinking?!  I don’t even think my gefilte fish tastes that good!

Maybe it’s like childbirth…you forget all the pain and suffering when everyone around you starts oohing and aahing over the end result.  And then people come to expect it…Passover wouldn’t be the same.  And my fish man, Jerry, from Nebraska… I talk to him once a year and he remembers my address! I tried not to call him this year, but I broke down in the end and placed my order at the last possible moment. How could I not call him before Passover?

Even the most torturous processes can be comforting. An hour of scrubbing the boiled-over burnt-on fish juice off the stove kept my mind painstakingly focused on my cleanser scarred fingertips. No other thoughts existed in my mind. I rubbed and scrubbed that stove until my cuticles started shedding and every speck of that black crusty glop was gone.  The sense of accomplishment in taking that stove down to its bare eyes and polishing it until it gleamed was beyond…well let’s just say, I am beginning to understand the methods of Bubbe’s cleaning madness.

Maybe we are just too much in our heads. Our minds are working overtime, so we engage in these consuming tasks.  they provide respite from being worried about your sore knee or the recent rapes in India…or being scared about not having an answer or trying to make sense of it all…so we go back for more.

Shaina, I love knowing that you have recognized the you you like.  I am proud that you have allowed yourself to go to a place where you are forced to pay attention to the process and to how you feel. And I am thrilled that you are playing…a lot.  You are correct.  Once you learn how to do these things, you can do them anywhere.  They are the answers to all the questions that really have no answers.  As your mother, and your biggest fan, it is my absolute pleasure to witness your remarkable journey…and to know, even if you don’t, that you are traveling in the right direction.

Learning how to rest

I am also practicing the fine art of playing and attending to the moments.  It is a lifelong learning.  I am grateful for my own evolving knowing of the me I like. I learned how to breathe a little more fully in yoga today and that downward dog really does provide a rest.

I feel good when I scrub down my kitchen and get a good foot massage when I get a pedicure.

Working out the kinks

I am learning a new way to hold up my head and strengthen my core so that my body doesn’t hurt me…and so I don’t hurt it.

I may even be able to balance my body…and my life…someday.

I have the rest of my life to learn…the same as you…the same as everyone.

This year just won’t be the same.

We’ll be having my gefilte fish at Seder in a few days. I am making some carrot Halwa and Indian Spiced Chicken. The agony of preparation will be over.  The Slivovitz will have kicked in and your presence will be both very much missed and very much felt in the moments of the evening.

Enjoy your Indian Passover at Hannah’s and don’t forget to Skype!

I love you and miss you.

Love,

Mom

Xoxooxoxoxo

P.S. I know you won’t be making Gefilte Fish anytime soon, but I needed to get it off my chest, so I am sending the recipe…and maybe someday.  I am also sending a favorite dessert.  It is as easy as the fish is hard and it will make the pain (it helps with the smell, too) go away.

Gefilte Fish

Makes 50 – 75 pieces depending on the size of each piece.

• 6 – 7 pounds of fish, filleted and deboned, save the heads, tails, bones and skin for fish broth
  Traditionally a combination of whitefish, yellow pike and carp is used for Gefilte Fish.
  I used carp (1lb.), buffalo fish (4 lbs.), walleye (1 lb.) and amberjack (1lb.) because that was what I could get.
• 3 onions
• 6 – 7 carrots
• Salt
• Pepper
• ½ cup sugar (or to taste)
• 4 -5 eggs
• 4 – 6 quarts of cold water
• ½ cup matzoh meal

Place the bones, skin and fish heads in a very large pot with the water and add 2 teaspoons of salt.  Cover and bring to a boil.  Remove the foam that accumulates.

Slice  2 onions in rounds and add to the fish broth.  Add the sugar and simmer for about 30 minutes while the fish mixture is being prepared.

All ground up and ready to go!

Grind the fish filets in a food processor with an onion and one or two carrots until it has a soft pasty texture.  Feel the fish with your hands to find any unground veiny pieces or small bones.  This is the really messy part and takes a while.

Add the eggs, one at a time, 2 teaspoons of salt and freshly ground pepper to taste and mix thoroughly. Mix in about a ½ cup of matzoh meal to make a light, soft mixture that will hold its shape.

Remove the fish heads, skins and bones from the fish broth. Add carrots cut in large chunks to the broth and return the broth to a simmer.

Wet hands with cold water and scoop up about a ¼ cup (may use more or less depending on how big you like your gefilte fish pieces) of the fish mixture and form into oval shapes. Gently place the fish patties into the simmering fish broth.  Cover loosely and simmer for 20 to 30 minutes.  Taste the liquid while the fish is cooking and add seasoning to taste. If you like a sweeter fish, add a little more sugar to the broth.  Simmer for another 20 minutes until flavors are cooked through and fish is done.

Using a slotted spoon, carefully remove the Gefilte Fish and arrange on a platter.  Reserve some of the fish broth to be served with the fish.

Cut cooked carrots into rounds on the diagonal and place on top of fish. Chill and garnish with parsley.  Have plenty of horseradish to serve with the Gefilte Fish.

The Chocolate Bomb

Preheat oven to 350°

Prep time – 15 minutes

Cooking time: 1 hour +

• 8 ounces German Sweet Chocolate or any good dark chocolate bars
• 2 teaspoons undiluted instant coffee or instant espresso powder
• 1 cup sugar
• ½ cup boiling water
• 1 cup butter at room temperature (2 sticks cut up into 6 pieces)
• 4 large eggs at room temperature
• 1 tablespoon flavoring of your choice – vanilla or almond extract or Cognac or Amaretto or any liqueur of your choice

Line a 5-cup soufflé dish, charlotte mold or oven proof ceramic bowl with a double thickness of foil.

This dessert is prepared entirely in a food processor using the basic steel chopping blade.

Break chocolate into pieces and drop into the food processor work bowl with instant coffee and sugar.  Pulse about 4 times until mixture gets started and then let processor run until the chocolate is finely chopped.

With processor running, pour boiling water through the feed tube. Let processor run until chocolate is melted and thoroughly mixed.

Add the butter and pulse 3 times.  Then let the processor run until the butter is blended completely into the chocolate mixture.

Add eggs and flavoring and process for 20 to 30 seconds.

Empty the mixture into the bowl lined with foil.  Bake in a preheated oven for about an hour.  Check after 45 minutes. It is done when it rises and a thick darkly browned (almost burnt) crust is formed.  Remove from oven and cool. The baked ball of chocolate will recede as it cools.

When cool, wrap foil around ball and seal in an airtight bag.  It may be stored in the refrigerator for up to two weeks or frozen for 2 months or more.

To serve, peel off foil and invert on a serving platter.  The outside of the ball will look sticky and irregular.

It can be garnished with strawberries or decorated with whipped cream or powdered sugar. Chill until serving time.  Cut in small pieces and serve.

Dear Shaina,

I keep reading your letter over and over again, just to look at the pictures…You in your ratty shorts and tee shirt standing by the stove, your hair haphazardly piled on top of your head and your smiling twisted body balancing your friend on your back at the Taj.  I can practically feel the dryness of your skin when I look at the picture of you touching the artistry on that wall. I love feeling you in your pictures. I guess I miss you, just a little!

People always ask me “How did you let her go?” or “Aren’t you scared?” 

The truth is… I am scared. I have been scared since the day you were yanked out of my body. It doesn’t really matter where you are. I will always be scared, but so what?  That doesn’t mean either of us have to stop living.  Being scared doesn’t change the outcome, whatever it may be.  So I ignore my scared in favor of marveling at your adventurous nature and taking pride in your accomplishments.

As far as not letting you go, was that ever even an option? I have been working on letting you go, also, since the day you were born. Isn’t that my job as a parent? Well, maybe I did too good a job.

I still do miss you. And your pictures bring you a little closer. I know that you are probably not missing us in exactly the same way, but I couldn’t help but think that you might find a small bit of pleasure from seeing some pictures of our life.  So I started taking pics everywhere I went…lest you think I just sit around all day and miss you.  I will warn you…these are iPhone pics taken in bad light by non-professionals in random situations at spontaneous moments. No photo commentary allowed.  These pics are for emotional purposes only.

As I looked through the lens of my camera, I realized that you are a virtual part of every scene in my life.

I volunteered at the White Elephant Sale at the Day School and there I was working in the gym in which you ran laps and said Shabbat blessings every Friday for eight years of your life. Your former principal was organizing the sale and we talked about where you were and what you were doing. You were with me in that gym for those hours that I folded and organized and stacked stuff.

I went over to the JCC to check out some replacement tiles for my mah jong set and they were teaching mah jong and needed a fourth, so I sat down at the table and there was your fifth grade teacher.  I remembered her name. She asked about you…and there you were again…with me at the table.

The NCCJ Awards dinner was last night and I was at a table with one of your Anytown co-workers.

I talked to a whole bunch of people who knew you and asked about you. My name was Shaina Shealy’s mom and I was so proud to have you with me all evening long.

There isn’t a day that goes by without a Shaina connection.

I know I haven’t mentioned much about food, although you are totally entwined in my life when it comes to food. My most recent experiment was replicating Bubbe’s Chicken Burgers.  Maybe I’m just in a missing mood, but I really wanted one of those garlicky Bubbe burgers, smothered with fried onions. I served them one Shabbat and everyone loved them. They were such a hit that I am considering making them as a Passover dish and using matzoh meal instead of flour.

I cant believe Passover is in three weeks!  Another opportunity to clean out the cupboards…and to miss you.  I’ll be pulling out the Indian fabric to drape over the tables and maybe even making a little Indian inspired spicy charoseth…to have a little of you there, at the table.

Have a wonderful Passover…wherever you happen to be…and keep sending those pictures!

Love,

Mom

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Bubbe’s Chicken Burgers

Easy and Delicious!

This recipe can be doubled for a crowd and the seasonings are really up to you. For gluten free burgers, just leave off the bread crumbs. They can be made cocktail sized and served on baguette rounds for a hearty appetizer.

• 4 -6 fresh cloves of garlic (use less if you’re not a garlic fan)
• ½ of a medium onion
• 2 pounds skinless boneless chicken breasts cleaned and trimmed (more or less)
• ⅓ cup bread crumbs
• 2 eggs
• Salt and pepper to taste
• 1 or 2 large sweet onions thinly sliced
• Olive oil

Put the onions and garlic in the food processor bowl with the steel chopping bladeand chop until minced. Add the chicken breasts, bread crumbs, eggs and salt and pepper to the bowl and process until the chicken is finely chopped.
In a large frying pan, sauté onions slices (I like a lot of onions) in a small amount of olive oil until translucent or lightly caramelized.  Use your hands (mixture is sticky so wet your hands with water as needed while making patties) to form chicken mixture into small flattened patties and sauté with the onions, adding oil as needed.  The onions will become more browned as the chicken burgers cook.  Cook thoroughly until done.  Make a small test burger and add seasonings as needed.

Can be served with pasta and salad or as a sandwich.  These are good hot, warm or cold.

2 pounds of chicken makes a whole lot of little burgers…enough for a crowd and leftovers. The recipe can easily be cut in half or doubled.

Burgers can be frozen and reheated. Just sauté some fresh onions and they are as good as the day they were made. They are almost as good as I remember Bubbe’s!

Dear Shaina,

Sorry I haven’t written. I didn’t shrug off my commitment…I just had no idea what day it was!  I have been in a suspended universe, crossing states and time zones and climates without intention, finding myself a bit surprised as the new flora and fauna appeared through the windshield.

Beautiful Skies Everywhere

Billboards and neon signs announced the emergence of fast food restaurants, motels and souvenir shops…way stations for travelers…sprouting up on the edge of the highway like bustling ant colonies. Gas stations offered up bathroom breaks and a 100 different flavors of beef jerky (I am not kidding). Hampton Inns and random small-town family owned ethnic restaurants offered some comfort as we settled in for the night and played a little makeshift two-person mah jong. Despite the cultural and topographical diversity, the McDonalds and Walmarts and Motel 6’s reminded us of the common thread that binds this country from end to end, however loosely.

The days had no names and the times kept changing so I just gave up on tracking them. My watch remained on Birmingham time.

And Beautiful Sunsets

Our goal was uneventful. Arriving safely was our objective and we did it! We made it in five and a half days. Hardly bad-assed and no strangers in the backseat (it was way too full of stuff).  I am amazed at how quickly one can whip across this country in a car.  I am inspired to do it again and take more time to experience the nuances of the American dream.  I am also inspired to clean out all the crap in our house, for your sake, if nothing else!

As for exaggerating adventures, yours or mine, I am way too old for that.  I know that life follows you wherever you go…with all its choices, dilemmas, joys and complications.

Life is short and full. So…why not? Go for it…with my fullest blessing!  I am looking forward to helping you pack up (I’m a pro), driving to NY with you and sending you off on this next journey, just as I am already praying for your safe return. I still can’t believe you are going back to India! At least its only for four months so I wont feel compelled to visit you again…I have had quite enough experience with alternative bathroom facilities for a while.   I am looking forward to reading all your weird Indian recipes!

Glad to be Home

In the meantime, I also participated in a mega Shabbat gathering while in San Francisco. We enjoyed homemade challah, stuffed peppers, roasted Brussel sprouts and a veggie stew and I learned how to make a delicious Persian rice dish that I think you’ll love.  It’s full of fresh herbs and fava beans and is delicious plain or served as an accompaniment to stuffed peppers or veggie stew.

Enjoy it all!

Love,

Mom xoxooxoxoxooxoxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxxoox

Lily’s Persian Style Herbed Rice 

Serves 10 – 15

(It looks more complicated than it is!)

• 2 cups basmati rice (brown or white)
• 2-3 Tblsp of salt
• 1 bunch fresh cilantro
• 1 bunch fresh dill
• 1 bunch fresh Italian parsley
• 2 bulbs fresh garlic or 3 cloves regular garlic minced
• 1 bunch green onions
• 1 1/2 cup frozen fava beans (may substitute lima beans or edamame)
• 1/4″ canola oil to cover the bottom of the pot
• 2 tsp turmeric
• 2 or 3 small potatoes (Yukon gold or red) sliced in thin rounds to cover the bottom of the pot
• 1/2 tsp Saffron threads crushed and dissolved in 2-3 Tblsp butter or oil with a 1 tsp sugar
• Salt and pepper to taste

Rinse uncooked rice in cold water several times until water runs clear.
Bring a large pot of water with 2-3 tblsp of salt to a boil. (Make sure the pot is a heavy bottom pot.)
Add basmati rice to boiling water and boil rapidly for 10 minutes until rice is partially cooked.  Do not overcook.
Bring pot to the sink and pour the cold water over the rice to make the starchy water overflow.
Drain rice into a colander and set rice aside in a large bowl.
Chop all dill, parsley, cilantro, garlic and onions together in a food processor .
With a large spoon, mix together the drained rice and all the herbs and beans and toss loosely into a mound in a large bowl.
Grind together with a mortar and pestle 1/2 tsp saffron, 1/2 tsp turmeric and a 1 tsp sugar .
In a small bowl, melt 2-3 tblsp butter and mix ground spices into melted butter.

Put the heavy bottomed pot back onto the stove.
Add oil (enough to just cover the bottom).
Add 1 1/2 tsp turmeric to the oil and heat over medium heat while stirring.
Slice small potatoes into thin rounds and cover the oil on bottom of the pot with one layer of potatoes.
Toss all of the rice mixture into the pot covering the potatoes.
Poke 3-4 holes with the long handle of a wooden spoon into the mound of rice and pour the butter and saffron mixture down the holes.
Place about 3 layers of paper towels or a clean cotton kitchen towel over the top of the pot and then place the lid tightly over the pot.
Cook at medium heat for 8 minutes.
Turn the stove down to the lowest temperature it will go and steam for 35 more minutes.  Be careful to keep the temperature low so you don’t burn the potatoes.
To serve, scoop the rice out from the top of the pan being careful not to brake the crust on the bottom. Place in a serving dish.
Once all the rice is out except for the potato crust (tadig), carefully remove the potato crust from the bottom of the pot and flip the crust over placing it over the rice in the serving dish.

It should be golden brown and beautiful! Enjoy!

Dear Shaina,

Yep…you upped the gross factor!  But I did love reading about the shechting process.  And it is very much about the process..just as life is.  Doesn’t so much matter where you go, but how you get there.  I do have to say the Chanukah cookies with the green avocado sesame glop didn’t look so appetizing either. Especially juxtaposed to the bloody goat slaughter description. I am in shock that you actually tasted goat! You, who has never even had a McDonalds hamburger in your life! What did it taste like? The thought of anything goat grosses me out.  I am the only person I know, except for your Dad, who even hates goat cheese.

As far as your child rearing advice…It is every mother’s greatest pleasure to say to their child “I cant wait until you have children of your own!” Because I’ll be watching…

Anyway, I am in the midst of getting ready for the annual Christmas trek to Dad’s family in South Carolina.   I just bought a turkey to prepare for dinner in S.C. Last night I made a squash casserole, Chocolate/almond Cheesecake (an annual request) and a no sugar added, gluten free apple crisp. We are stopping at the farm on the way to pick some kale for you so you can get your fix of fresh greens and turnips.

Have Cheesecake…Will Travel!

Trite as it sounds, its hard to believe another year has flown by. The years really do seem to pass exponentially faster as you get older.  The last time I made a cheesecake was a year ago…for the Shealy Christmas dinner.  You had just started your job…can you believe a year already? Next month, it will be two years since I retired.  It doesn’t seem possible…and I haven’t even started cleaning out the closets!

I am beginning to understand why people my age say that these are the best years of your life.  If you are fortunate enough to have lived to this age, you know how quickly your time on this earth passes.  You are finally free from the fantasies of what you thought life would or should be.  And your true wants become crystallized as you fill the new-found space in your life with family, friends and activities that nurture your mind (mah jong), fortify your body (yoga) and enrich your soul (cooking, writing, sharing, loving, thinking, praying and being grateful).  No more wasted worries, punishing judgments or chasing somebody else’s dreams.

Life is good! I know how little time is left and I aim to make the most of it…even if I leave you with a lot of overstuffed closets!

Have a safe flight and we’ll see you very soon, greens and veggies in hand!

Love,

Mom
Xooxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

SQUASH CASSEROLE

This very easy recipe is a variation on a Southern tradition. There is a lot of room for modification based on tastes and dietary needs. Any cheese will work.  Sauteed mushrooms and green onions can be added to the basic squash mixture before baking.  Garlic, basil, tarragon, dill or Indian spices can be added to give a unique flavor to this basic squash casserole recipe.   It freezes and travels well, feeds a crowd and makes a great brunch dish.

Ready to Pop in the Oven

BASIC CASSEROLE

• 5 pounds (about) of yellow crook necked squash cut up in large chunks
• 3 carrots cut in large chunks
• 1 – 2 onions quartered
• 2 TBLSP butter (room temp) + 1 TBLSP for casserole dish
• 1 ½ cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese
• ½ Cup sour cream or plain Greek yogurt (low fat is fine)
• 3 eggs, lightly beaten
• Vegetable Bouillon (optional)
• Salt, pepper

TOPPING

• 1 cup bread crumbs, plain or seasoned (or ground up crackers, corn flakes or favorite savory crumb topping)*
•  2 TBLSP melted butter
• ¾ cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese (more or less as desired)

Gluten-Free Nut Topping

*For a gluten-free topping, substitute your favorite chopped nuts and ground up rice crackers or other gluten-free crackers

DIRECTIONS
Place cut up squash, carrots and onions in a large pot filled with salted (or use veggie or chicken flavored soup powder) water to barely cover veggies.

Boil water and cook veggies until tender.

Drain cooked squash and veggies thoroughly.  (I save the seasoned drained liquid and use it as a base for homemade soup. If you have no plans to make soup, put it in a container and freeze it for the next time you do.)

Preheat oven to 350°

Blend while hot

Put hot drained vegetables in a large bowl and use a stick blender to chop and blend the onions carrots and squash until they are the consistency of coarse baby food (in fact, if you have a baby, take some out at this point and reserve for baby).

Add 2 TBLSP of butter to the hot veggies and stir in until melted.

Add Cheese

Add shredded cheese and thoroughly mix in.

Add sour cream or yogurt and mix in.  Taste for seasonings and add salt, pepper or optional spices to taste.

Mix in lightly beaten eggs.

Place 1 TBLSP of butter in a 9” x 13” glass baking pan or other large casserole baking dish. Preheat in oven until butter is melted and slightly browned.

Mix all topping ingredients together.

Pour squash mixture into heated buttered baking dish.  Top with topping mixture and bake for 45 minutes or until casserole is set and topping is browned.  If topping is browning too quickly, cover with foil.

If you plan on freezing and reheating, cook for 30 minutes without topping.  Cool and freeze.  When you are ready to serve, defrost thoroughly.   Add topping and bake at 350° for 30 – 45 minutes.

BASIC APPLE CRISP

No Sugar Added
Gluten-Free

• About 5 pounds of your favorite apples, peeled, cored and sliced (¼” thick)
• ½ – ¾ cup of raisins or currants
• Zest and juice of 1 orange
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• ½ tsp almond extract
• 1 – 2 TBLSP ground Cinnamon (or to taste)
  

  For dessert or Breakfast!

TOPPING

• 1 Cup rolled oats
• 1 Cup chopped walnuts
• 1 TBLSP melted butter
• Cinnamon to taste

Preheat oven to 350°

Mix cut up apples, raisins, zest, juice, spices and flavorings in a very large bowl until all flavors and ingredients are blended.

Put 1 TBLSP of butter in a deep 9”x13” casserole dish and heat in oven until butter is melted and slightly browned.

Mix together all topping ingredients a small bowl.

Spoon fruit mixture into heated, buttered casserole dish as full as possible to the limit of the dish.  The apples will shrink as they cook.

Top with topping mix.

Place in oven for about an hour until apples are thoroughly cooked and juices at bottom of pan are bubbly and topping is browned.  If topping browns too quickly, turn oven to 325° halfway through the baking time.

This dish freezes well.

It makes a great dessert warm and served with ice cream  or whipped cream  I love it for breakfast served with plain Greek Yogurt.

Dear Shaina,

Thanks for the compliment (?) on my photography.  I got photography lessons for my birthday, so watch out! I still don’t get what you have against naked birds.

Speaking of photography, thank you for enabling this new pursuit of mine.  Per the ongoing family discussion, I think the concept of “enabling” has been given a bad rap. Enabling isn’t all bad.  Sure it can be crippling and disabling and undermining, but it can also facilitate growth and independence and self-pride.

My first blog pictures sucked and you let me know it…and you told me how I could make them better.

Kale Salad with Feta

You enabled me to not only acquire a new skill, but also to think in a new way about the possibilities of what I might yet learn. You told me I could figure out how to do my own posting on the blog.  I didn’t think so, but you signed me up anyway, gave me a few tips and some encouragement and told me you didn’t have time to post my letter and I would have to do it myself. You empowered me! It took me six hours and I had to get some help from the trainers at the Apple store, but I did it…and I was proud…and now I own it!

Too much enabling?

It could have gone differently.  You could have said to me, “Mom, I’ll take care of it…I’ll do all the pictures and the posting…you just write.”  I might have felt supported, but I never would have found my own abilities.

You believed in me and you facilitated my growth. Enabling, the good or the bad kind, requires a willing partner…and I did my part, too.

I would like to think that we were enabling parents…that we enabled you to think for yourself, to see yourself honestly and to fully engage in the pursuit of meaning and happiness in your life, despite the angst.  In truth, you were a willing partner to our enabling.  You used what we gave you to fuel possibilities that we didn’t even know existed. You took advantage of opportunities without ever taking advantage of us or taking for granted what you had. And you always let us know when we were stepping over the line. Even at 4 years old, you let us know, sitting down in the middle of the soccer field during a game to let me know, unequivocally, no matter how much I pushed, that you were NOT playing soccer…and I never tried to make you do anything again (you may feel differently about that, but I did try to stay out of your way…really!).

You OWN your life…and that is the best that any parent can wish for their child… even with the burdens and obligations that live with that ownership.

Garlic Roasted Smashed Turnips

So, maybe our definitions of support/enabling differ slightly.

I can live with that. I do, however, take issue with your representation of the paralyzing turnip noose.

I cop to the overbearing love, but that’s old news…deal with it.

But the turnips?…that was self defense.

More Greens!

Your father brought home another huge black garbage bag full of kale and assorted unnamed greens and yet another bag filled with dozens of very dirt laden turnips.

There are only so many ways to fix turnips and to eat kale and turnip greens, despite the number of recipes you come up with.

I have had turnips …and greens…raw, cooked, fried, mashed, roasted, boiled and mixed with any number of edible any-things-I-can-think-of…every night this week!

Now that’s a TURNIP!

Dad is obsessed with turnips and greens!

He loves them, especially when I make the recipe below.

And he’s talking about picking more this weekend!!!  HELP!! If I thought I could mail you a crateful, I would…and it would have NOTHING to do with overbearing love or my womb!

Can’t wait to see you in a few weeks!

Love,

Mom

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

This is my all-time favorite turnip recipe (and Dad’s).

BUTTERY TURNIPS AND ONIONS

(With or without the greens)

• 1 large onion cut up in small chunks
• 3-4 turnips cut into ½ inch chunks (peeled or unpeeled)
• 2 cloves garlic, chopped or garlic powder
• A large bowl of Greens, washed, stems removed and torn in large pieces (kale, turnip, beet, any greens will do)
• 1 T Olive oil
• 1 T Butter (more if you like)
• Salt and Pepper
  

  We ate them all!

Saute the chopped onion in a large frying pan with olive oil until translucent.  Add the garlic and saute until onions and garlic are lightly browned.  Add the cut-up turnips to the frying pan and continue cooking for a minute or two. Add the butter and continue cooking the onion and turnip mixture until tender. Add salt, pepper and additional garlic to taste.

If you don’t like greens, the turnips and onions cooked until tender are delicious and can be served without adding the greens.

This dish is also delicious with the added greens.  While the onions and turnips are cooking, massage the washed greens with a little sea salt and let sit until the turnips are just tender.  Add the greens to the frying pan, stirring the greens into the turnip-onion mixture and continue cooking over medium heat until the greens are wilted and desired tenderness.  Adjust seasonings to taste.

Dear Shaina,

Reading your letter made me want to make those scones and muffins so badly, but I was a little overwhelmed getting ready for Thanksgiving.  I will make them, someday…and I have a great rye scone recipe to share with you…someday. In the meantime, here’s a tip for keeping butter cold when making scones. Freeze a stick of butter and then grate the butter into the flour using the larger holes on a box grater.  It’s easier, less messy and the butter stays really cold.

I have to say this year’s Thanksgiving was one of the best I can remember, ever! From the minute you walked through the door (leaving a trail of suitcases, bags, shoes, clothes…) until you left a week later, we didn’t stop…talking, cooking, eating, shopping, eating, cooking, cleaning, talking, eating and cleaning some more…with family, friends, more friends, more family…I LOVED it!!

And so many firsts… I will take full credit for inviting our favorite massage therapist and her family to Thanksgiving dinner, that is if she wanted to work during the day doing massages in our downstairs “spa-for-the-day” den. She did. All the women in the family scheduled an hour massage and enjoyed our transformed “spa” basement complete with scented candle and refreshing citrus infused water as they indulged in the pleasure and pain of an Eleanore massage.  Our masseuse, who is now like family, earned a little cash, didn’t have to cook and enjoyed a wild Thanksgiving dinner, with her family, at the Schuster/Shealy household. All agreed that this was a new tradition worth repeating!

Then there was the turkey…my first KOSHER turkey. (see Recipe below) I must say, the Rabbis know nothing about depilatory techniques. Little did I know I was opting for a bird with a 5- o’clock shadow and a serious case of in-grown stubble that defied the usual turkey wash-and-rinse once-over. I scrubbed and scraped and pulled at those feather nubs till my fingers cramped. What?!…No electrolysis, laser hair removal, Nair?  There must be a better way! I dug around in my kitchen drawer for some modern day feather-plucking kitchen tool that surely I had picked up because I knew I would need one someday. And there it was, a relic from the seventies waiting to be repurposed, a hemostat.  It was the perfect tool! Time consuming? Yes, plucking each hair follicle one by one! Two hours later, my turkey (we got real up-close and personal) was clean, exfoliated and stubble-free…I mean, this turkey got the full Brazilian!  It was delicious…and I would do it again…but I sure do wish those Rabbis would get some advice from their wives about hair removal before sending their turkeys out that way.

Shaina’s Sweet Potatoes and Kale?!

And finally…Shaina in the kitchen with Mama…did I say cyclone? My turkey and dressing (see Recipe below)…your sweet potatoes with coconut milk and kale(?)…my green beans with lemon zest and parsley (see Recipe below) and your lemon scented basil quinoa, again, with kale.  We had sugar free, gluten free, non dairy, vegan, vegetarian and every other option too. Was everyone happy? How could they not be? They’re coming back next year…all 25 of them!

Most of all, I loved trashing the kitchen with you…watching you slice and dice and taste and mix and adjust and taste some more until it was just right. You take risks with flavors and ingredients and trust that they will turn out alright…and they do, in fact better than alright. I promised myself that I will try some of those strange spices that sit in my spice drawer waiting for you to come home.  I even enjoyed cleaning up the trails of droppings you left in the wake of your cooking experiments.

This was the first Thanksgiving that we really did together! I really love being with you always, but the kitchen…is a really special place when you’re in it. 

Oh, did I say how thankful I am? I am so thankful for my life, for my family and friends, for our good health and good fortune and… for all the blessings that I enjoy every day!

Love, Mom
xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxo

ROASTING A TURKEY (It’s Easy!)

Two – 14 pound turkeys fed 25 people and left plenty of leftovers.

• 1 Turkey (or 2 smaller ones if you have a lot of leg and thigh lovers)
• 1 Garlic bulb, peeled and minced (more can be used if you have a very large turkey or if you like a lot of garlic)
• 3-4 Celery stalks with the leaves
• 4-5 Carrots cut into 3″ chunks
• 2 Onions cut up
• Salt and Pepper
• Olive oil

If frozen, thoroughly defrost the turkey so it will be ready to clean and season the night before you plan on roasting it. Clean the inside and outside of the turkey thoroughly, removing the neck and any other parts from the cavity. Kosher turkeys only come with the neck which I clean and roast with the turkey. Kosher turkeys also tend to have a lot of ugly stubble, so leave extra time for cleaning.  Pat dry and place breast side up on rack in the roaster that you will be roasting the turkey in.

Mix a little olive oil with the minced garlic and rub all over the turkey inside and out, including a little under the breast skin.  Salt and pepper the turkey liberally inside and out.  Place celery, carrots and onions in the bottom of the roaster around the turkey. Reserve a piece of carrot, onion  and celery and place inside the cavity of the turkey.

After seasoning, I truss the turkey using string and tying it around the legs and breast horizontally and vertically. It makes it a little easier to get it out of the roaster when it’s done.  Cover the turkey with the roaster lid, or aluminum foil if you are using an open roaster, and let sit overnight in the refrigerator.

On cooking day, take covered turkey out of the refrigerator a few hours before cooking time and let the turkey come to room temperature before placing in the oven. Preheat the oven to 350°.  Place covered turkey in oven and check after one hour and then every 45 minutes after that until almost done.  When checking, baste juices over the top and sides of the turkey.  Cook turkey about 14 minutes per pound or until legs separate slightly from the body of the turkey and juices run clear. Roast turkey uncovered for the last half hour to brown the outside.  A little oil may be brushed on the skin to facilitate a brown crispy skin.

Remove turkey from the oven when done and let it “rest” uncovered for about 20 minutes before slicing and serving.  Remove the roasted carrots and place on the serving platter with the turkey. Enjoy!

GRAVY
Pour the turkey juices from the roaster into a pot.  The onions and celery can be strained or removed with a slotted spoon if you like a clear gravy.  Add some parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme (or poultry seasoning) and salt and pepper to taste.

Heat over the stove while turkey is “resting”.  If you leave the celery and onions in the gravy, you can use a stick blender to chop and blend them into the gravy to add a little substance. Small scraps of turkey from the carving process can also be added to the gravy.

If you like a thicker gravy, place a tablespoon of flour or potato starch into a small cup and stir a few tablespoons of turkey juice into the cup stirring the flour and gravy until smooth.  Continue adding turkey juice to the mixture in the cup and stirring until the flour mixture is soupy and not lumpy.  Pour flour mixture into the pot of gravy/juice and bring to a boil. Cook over low heat until gravy thickens and serve with sliced turkey.

DRESSING: NORTH MEETS SOUTH
I never stuff my turkey, but my family loves dressing. I have always tried to appease both sides of the family by making two separate dressings; a southern style cornbread dressing sans veggies and a typical northern bread stuffing with onions, carrots and celery.  This year I combined the two and everyone was happy, especially me! This dressing is vegetarian and can be made vegan by leaving off the eggs. It makes  about 20 servings.

• 1 Bag Cornbread Stuffing Mix
• 1 regular sized loaf of whole wheat or white bread toasted and broken into pieces
• 2 Onions, chopped
• 4 Carrots, chopped
• 3 Stalks of Celery, chopped
• Olive oil
• About 2 quarts of  Chicken Broth (vegetarian chicken soup powder and boiling water
• 3 Eggs
• Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme or poultry seasoning mix
• Pepper

Sauté chopped onions, carrots and celery in a little olive oil until soft.  This may be done the day before.
Mix together cornbread mix and regular toasted bread.
Add cooked veggies to the bread mix.
Add “chicken” broth to bread mixture.
Add enough broth to make a very loose liquidy dressing (the consistency of cooked grits for the southerners out there).  You can add boiling water if the mixture is too thick.  You don’t want to see any pooling liquid in the mixture, but you want to be able to pour the mixture into a casserole.
Taste and add spices as desired.
Lightly beat 3 eggs and thoroughly mix into dressing mixture.  Eggs may be omitted for vegan diets.
Pour a little oil into the bottom of an oversized casserole dish or 2 smaller casserole dishes and preheat in a 350° oven until oil is heated.  Pour dressing mix into hot casserole dish and bake uncovered until done.
30 minutes for smaller casseroles and up to an hour for a large casserole.

The dressing should hold together loosely but not be dry. Top can be slightly browned.

GREEN BEANS (inspired by the Barefoot Contessa)

• 1 pound Haricots Verts (French Green Beans)
• 1/2 Bunch fresh flat leafed parsley, chopped
• Zest of 2 lemons (1 TBLSP)
• 2 Cloves Garlic, minced
• Olive oil Salt and pepper

Microwave Haricots Verts for 3 minutes on high or until slightly undercooked for desired doneness. Mix lemon zest and chopped parsley and set aside. Heat olive oil in large sauté pan toss in Haricots Verts and minced garlic and cook until beans are done to desired tenderness. Remove form pan and toss with lemon zest and parsley.  Salt and pepper to taste and serve.