◊ Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

You’re going to be grossed out.

When I got back from Passover, I noticed a dead animal smell coming from the kitchen.  I asked one of my 4 other housemates about it — she acknowledged the smell, teased me about my reluctance to search for the rotting animal (what if I had found it!?), and recapped her weekend for me. I went to the grocery store, unpacked my things, and went to bed. The smell got worse.

We have mice.  It’s fine. We all signed a waiver saying that we were warned about the dangerous quantity of lead in the building. It’s fine.  My floor is caving in. It’s fine. And there are five of us – so if I can’t stomach the removal a dead animal… it’s fine.

Jump To Recipe

The dead animal smell originated behind the oven. Did a mouse scurry past while I was roasting beets, burn it’s little feet, get stuck and die? I just bought a large green cabbage to broil – if I turned on the oven, would the little guy turn to ashes?

I couldn’t bring myself to open the oven door.

But I had a cabbage and it was Passover and every grocery store in DC sold out of matzah. So hungry!

I stood as far away from the oven as possible, and chopped the cabbage into small shreds.  I added pink lady apples, raw walnuts, apple cider vinegar, poppy seeds, and some India-inspired spice.  So tangy and spicy and crunchy! It was dinner and lunch (with yogurt stirred in to cool the spices) and then more dinner.

The dead animal smell disappeared after 3 days. All is fine.

But I still couldn’t bear the thought of a dead mouse on an oven rack. I couldn’t be the first to use it. So I had fun with raw-inspired concoctions while waiting for one of the other housemates to use the oven and risk mouse discovery. When I walked in on Arielle safely baking something, I’d never felt so relieved. I pulled out my beets, wrapped them in foil, and loaded them to roast.  How did I go without beets for a whole three days? It’s fine.

Hope you can make this in a more comfortable environment.



Safety Slaw

Safety Slaw: It ain’t normal

  • Half head of green cabbage, shredded
  • Splash of apple cider vinegar
  • Handful of raw (crushed) walnuts
  • 1 pink lady apple
  • handful parsley
  • a few chives
  • juice of one lemon
  • sprinkle of cumin
  • sprinkle of turmeric
  • cayenne pepper to taste
  • 1 tbs poppy seed
  • half bunch of fresh coriander or cilantro
  • dash of sea salt
  • Greek yogurt to taste

Mix it all together and enjoy!

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